Tag: confessions

Confessions – 14th ed.

Sarah1 Comment

Hi. Hey. Hello there! And welcome to the first 2021 confessions post. I felt that since we are more than half way through the year I probably should confess some shit.

Newish here? Let me give you the skinny. I have this problem where I’m overly honest and tend to share my confessions publicly. It’s an issue and gets me in trouble sometimes. *shrugs*

Where do I begin…

  • I 1000% have a crush on Elliot Stabler in Law & Order: SVU and I could not wait for Law & Order: Organized Crime to start in April. And now it’s here and I’m just going to say it – he’s sixty and sexy and I would have his babies. Twice.
  • I love to create playlists…but I do not know how to make them an appropriate length. They just become hours upon hours worth of music. I need training.
  • I found my first gray hair (on my head *ahem*) and FREAKED OUT. Is this what happens at 35? I’m not ready.
  • At any given time, I have at least three bottles of my favorite non-dairy creamer on hand. It was out of stock one time and I am forever traumatized.
  • Yes I said non-dairy. I’m officially too much dairy destroys me but I eat it anyway and pay for it later years old.
  • Lately, I’ve caught myself emotionally eating. It’s not good. I need to do something constructive.
  • Yellow has always been my spirit color but lately I find that I need it more. It’s simply brings me happiness.
  • There is a serious lack of motivation happening right now in my life. Don’t get me wrong – I have a shit ton of work to get done but zero energy or desire to do any of it.
  • I’m cheating on my favorite yogurt. They don’t sell it at Kroger anymore. I can only get it from a local grocery store, so I grab a few when I run in there to get something (if I remember). I feel guilty. The other yogurt is okay.
  • My oldest pup – Alvin – is deaf now. When the vet confirmed this in his last appointment I sobbed like a baby. I know he will be okay but I was just sad for him. How scary was that? He was losing his hearing this whole time and I didn’t know. 😦
  • Vintage resellers on Instagram are my current kryptonite.

These are my confessions.

Confessions – 13th ed.

SarahLeave a comment

Hi. Welcome to another edition of my confessions. It’s been a minute since I spilled my guts so this might be a longer list than usual.

If you’re new here – save yourself! I mean, welcome! I have a condition known as word vomit where I have a bad habit of speaking the truth. Too often. It’s side effects include bull shit intolerance and loss of friendships. Also, emotional eating and sudden death. But it’s fine. Anyway, every now and then I opt to just confess on Al Gore’s internet because why the hell not.

  • So I’m finding that a global pandemic is a solid excuse for canceling plans or having to reschedule appointments/meetings. They really cannot get mad at you.
  • I am an overthinking, over analyzing crazy bitch. Yes. I know this about myself and I do it anyway. Pretty sure it’s a form of self destruction.
  • Lyrics, like quotes, carry a lot of meaning for me.
  • I’m addicted to Trader Joe’s dark chocolate peanut butter cups and I hide them from my kid because while sharing is caring – that rule does not apply to mama’s chocolate. Haven’t had them? Go. Now. Go right now and get some. I can wait….
  • I’m low key jealous of those houses in the neighborhood that are perfectly gingerbreaded with Christmas lights. One day I’ll be independently wealthy and will just have extra money laying about to have this done for me. Until then, I will drive by in awe of other people’s perfectly lit homes. Nevermind. Who am I kidding? I will NEVER have hoards of money to spend on something like that. I guess I’ll just be forever butthurt.
  • Occasionally, it sounds like someone is walking on the second floor of the house when we are all downstairs. (I KNOW I KNOW – I SAGED AND EVERYTHING!!!!) It could be the wind since this house has drafty ass windows. But I have convinced myself that this is just my fairy godmother checking in. She’s a little thick, so she’s not as light in her feet.
  • I have over 150 items in my Amazon saved for later cart. It’s a problem.
  • For Thanksgiving this year – I found myself thankful for things like alone time, masks, my divorce, having particular people in my life this year….in addition to the usual stuff like family and good health.
  • There are at least three more tattoos in my future. And I’m super excited about it!
  • Holiday foods I cannot condone: whipped mashed potatoes (where the fuck are the lumps, yo?!), canned cranberry anything, stuffing or dressing (whatever you call it), eggnog (*gags*), and fruitcake (I would actually rather be put down).
  • I love the Amazon man. He’s essentially my boyfriend. He comes to see me regularly and he brings me things.
  • I am a sucker for a Buzzfeed list. “58 Fancy But Inexpensive Gifts For Everyone On Your List” or “3984 Things You Didn’t Know You Needed But Totally Do” or “38 Books to Read If You Loved Harry Potter” or “47 Things For the Geek In Your Life”…you get the idea. I’m the person who goes through them, the person who adds that shit to their wish list on Amazon, the person who is like,”shut the front door, I do need that.” This is like the virtual Target Dollar Bin for me.
  • Wrapping presents is a hobby of mine. You hate it? Totally fine. Bring me yours and I’ll wrap them for you. I LOVE TO WRAP!

These are my confessions.

Confessions – 12th ed.

SarahLeave a comment

It’s been a minute so I think I’m due for a public admission of my sins and other shit.

New to my shenanigans? I like to confess my things on my blog. It makes me feel ever so slightly lighter and it’s swimsuit season y’all, so any little bit helps. What are your confessions?

  • As much as I hate people, I miss working in the office. And I miss looking forward to coming home.
  • The vanilla cone is back at McDonald’s! GO! RUN! Get one, ten, now! I’ve honest to Google, never been happier. I’ve had a few…
  • Yellow makes me happy. So happy. It’s my spirit color.
  • I think White Claws are trash. Yeah I said what I said and I’m not sorry!!!
  • Right now, I’m winging this thing they call life and it scares the shit out of me. I’m a planner person and the fact that I can’t clearly see in front of me makes me nervous.
  • There are only two things I physically like about myself: my hair (it’s fabulous) and my eyes. That’s it. Self love is clearly something I need to work on…
  • I have created a lot of playlists on Spotify. Most recently I started a Country one. I KNOW. This was shocking to me too. I’m still processing. But my niece would probably be very pleased.
  • I absolutely love to buy underwear. Legit my favorite thing to shop for.
  • It appears that I am chronically behind on good TV. There is a lot of shit out there that I just haven’t seen/binged or only seen part of here and there. The list includes: Curb Your Enthusiasm, How I Met Your Mother, The Big Bang Theory, Arrested Development, Archer, It’s Always Sunny In Philadelphia…I could go on. I know I know. I should take my 30 days of PTO and dedicate my time to rectifying this mistake.

These are my confessions.

Confessions – 11th ed.

SarahLeave a comment

Hi and welcome to the first confession of 2020!

New here? I’m a notorious confessor. I already have this problem of being very blunt (the bluntest blog – get it?) but on top of that I tend to confess things to the bloggy-verse. *shrugs* Oh well, shit happens. AND this whole global pandemic thing isn’t helping AT ALL. So…let’s begin.

  • I miss seeing people I actually like. Yes, I am locked up with my kid and yes I like her most days. But I mean people I actually like and want to spend time with. You know?
  • I have a secret hiding place for a Costco size jar of salted, dark chocolate caramels. JUDGE ME ALL YOU WANT BUT I LIVE WITH MONSTERS.
  • As of late – I’ve been very into my horoscope and have fallen into the madness that is Secret Tarot’s YouTube channel. She’s incredible.
  • I’m a difficult egg to crack. It’s hard for me to trust, to put my guard down. Very few manage to get through. And when I do finally let my walls down…I surrender completely.
  • I put on perfume everyday after I shower. Yes, even if I’m not going anywhere. Why can’t I feel pretty? There is no need to live like animals.
  • We have a cat – Kiko. He’s a great cat and I like him. I just don’t want a cat.
  • I can’t seem to journal, as of late. It’s like I lost the ability to write. So I’m doodling. Lots and lots of doodling.
  • We’ve only lived in this house a year but I can honestly say I’m not big on my new-ish neighbors. They are nice enough and don’t appear to be serial killers or anything. But my old crew were THE BEST and these new people just don’t have it.
  • I’m convinced my hair has stopped growing and is falling out. Stressing about it isn’t helping – that is for sure. But I’m in my thirties for Christ’s sake! So I’ve invested in shampoo and conditioner to help my hair grow. I know, right? It’s a thing – put it in the Google.
  • Lately, I’ve been sleeping cattywampus or completely sideways in bed. It feels more occupied that way.
  • The best part about social distancing is that I now have a legit excuse to socially distance from my family.
  • My kid is obsessed with Nutella. Sometimes I sneak a spoonful (or two) when no one is looking. And then when the jar runs out super fast I totally scold her for eating too much of it.
  • I feel like 2020 will be the year I get my first tattoo or a new piercing… something permanent to represent change.

These are my confessions.

Confessions – 10th ed. – Special edition!

SarahLeave a comment

If you’re new to these parts – I like to confess shit. Just say things that the bloggy-verse that I probably should say in actual confession [or to no one at all]. But you know – relieve the burden of carrying it around in my head. And I’m aging so I only have so much head space to spare.

This is a special confessions edition, specific on mental health since May was Mental Health Awareness Month. Yeah I’m late – but shit happens. And no I am not going to lecture you but rather confess some [very hard] truths about my mental health in hopes you might confess or face some hard truths about your own or someone you know. Regardless, know that it’s real, it can be very scary and very lonely and it should always be taken seriously.

So lets confess some shit…

  • I have chronic depression and anxiety disorder. And I am heavily medicated.
  • I have good days and bad days. Peaks and valleys.
  • My depression began in middle school (about 6th grade) and anxiety kicked into high gear in high school. I don’t recall anytime since then that I’ve not had either in my life.
  • In my family – mental health anything was frowned upon. You were depressed? You were supposed to get over it. You had anxiety? You were told to stop being anxious. Period.
  • I once went off my meds cold turkey. Serotonin withdrawal is awful. NOT RECOMMENDED.
  • My depression has taken many forms over the years. From nights planning my death and calling the Suicide Lifeline (1-800-273-8255, just in case you need it) to cutting, pill taking, hiding my home or just not being able to fully function.
  • My anxiety has also surfaced in many forms over the years. Panic attacks that would send me to the ER with a heart rate into the 180s+, blackouts where I’d wake up really disoriented and not know who/where/what the hell was going on for about 30 mins, dizziness, blurred vision, the shakes, and so on.
  • When Mike and I started dating- my panic attacks slowed down dramatically.
  • I have eczema and pick at it when I’m stressed or down or just want to hurt, to feel something. My arms are scared and most of the time I don’t care to show them.
  • I have two main outlets to deal with life – writing and reading.
  • I’ve kept a journal for as long as I can remember. Most of my childhood journals were destroyed by my mother (a post for another time). But I’ve always kept a journal and always will.
  • I read to escape into new places, take new adventures, solve new mysteries. To get out of my own head for a while. This is part of the reason I needed a library in my home.
  • Working out is starting to become a new outlet. SHOCKING FOR ME, I KNOW!!! But I think it’s because I pushing myself. I’m also in the renaissance!
  • Sometimes I’m entirely nonfunctional. I feel like an awful human being. And I hate that my kid is now old enough know something is wrong.
  • I’ve found some comfort in other people who understand. I often seek refuge in the words of Jenny Lawson, my favorite blogger and author. She gets that’s depression lies and darkness is real. She saves me.

These are my [mental health] confessions.

Confessions – 8th ed.

SarahLeave a comment

confession_page_banner

Holy shit! I am yet to confess in 2018!! This might be a long one, you guys. I need to confess some serious shit STAT!

If this is your first confession with me – this is how it works: I have this problem where I just say things. I’m blunt {hence the name of my blog} and I don’t know how to hold back. So I confess my feelings, secrets, lame shit… all of the above. I’m not sure it’s a very endearing quality but oh well. Time to confess…

  • I. HATE. PEOPLE. I know you know this about me but the hatred has grown exponentially. I might need to see a doctor.
  • I’m binging NCIS on Netflix right now because I’m 85 years old and I have a legit crush on Leroy Jethro Gibbs. I MEAN COME ON.

ncis_profiles_hero_leroy

  • I have officially been blogging on WordPress (not blogging as a whole) for 11 years. I don’t have much to show for it but that’s okay. I don’t do this for you. I do this for me.
  • This is a new era for me – one I have deemed #sarahsrenaissance.
  • When you have curly hair – no one notices when it gets long. My hair is actually almost to my butt – longest it’s been in years – but still curls to my shoulders. NOT A SOUL HAS NOTICED. Ass holes.
  • I am recovering from bronchitis. It kicked my actual ass. I was legit sick for over 3 weeks and am still not 100%. It’s fucking bull shit.
  • I don’t understand people who you haven’t spoken to (either in real life or on social media) in years or have any interaction with whatsoever who creep on your social and then comment like your families hang out every weekend at the pool. WHAT ARE YOU DOING?
  • Making a planner decision for the upcoming year takes me weeks of studying, research, debate, confiding in my best, etc. and is easily one of the hardest #firstworldproblems I’ll encounter for the year. My husband makes a mockery of the whole thing. Whatever.
  • I’m intrigued by dip powder nails. I don’t know why….
  • I took my tweenager and two pups on vacation by myself and NO ONE DIED!! I’ll admit, I thought it would be a disaster but it went better than expected. I consider this a great accomplishment.
  • I’m revisiting my like for pins. And Etsy is my playground.

Related image

  • Never have I ever paid to have someone torture me in the gym before. I believe they call these professionals, trainers. However, I am closer to my first goal major weightloss achievement and am highly considering it. Clearly, not only am I losing weight, but also brain cells.
  • The 90s are back and I am here for all of it. I will say I find it super irritating that these little teeny bopper shits are rocking NKOTB and Run DMC shirts like it’s no big deal but they wouldn’t even know their epics jams if they were smacked in the face with their CDs.
  • I AM READY FOR SWEATER WEATHER! Fuck Summer. I am over it. I am ready for cardigans, Birkenstock clogs (yeah I still wear them and since the 90s are back – I’m totally in fashion, so there!!!), Fall foilage and WINTER. (NOTE: I am ANTI-pumpkin spice)
  • I am literally running out of clothes to wear that fit me and I am too cheap to buy myself new clothes. I’m the money/bill person at our house. All I see are $$$ and how I could utilize that in a more productive fashion (pardon the pun) versus just buying clothes.
  • Fairly confident that I will purchase whatever phone Apple drops this year because my 6s is acting like a piece of shit and I refuse to only have a work phone.
  • We have a neighborhood poopbandit who has been shitting in the community pool. As a result the pool as been closed for cleaning. I may never set foot in it again.
  • The prospect of three paychecks in one month always gets me giddy! And then life happens and somehow I don’t get to enjoy that extra paycheck. Sigh.
  • My kid has to get a new competition leo for the second year in a row. Last year I was told the leo would be used for two years. APPARENTLY we are getting new ones this year because some parents complained about the red of the leos from last year (they were black, red and sliver) and are totally okay dropping $300.00 for shits and giggles. I want names. I want the names of said complainers so I can find them and give them something to actually complain about. And also bill them $300.00 for the extra fucking leo I have to buy.
  • I have no use for Facebook anymore. I actually hate it. If it wasn’t for family overseas – I would delete it. I don’t get me started on FB messenger…

 

These are my confessions.