I don’t believe in Valentine’s Day but here is a list of acceptable gifts…JUST IN CASE.

I think Valentine’s Day is bull shit. If you care deeply or love someone shouldn’t you show that love all year round? Seems insane to me that we dedicate one day to buy overpriced roses, go out to eat with a bazillion other people and declare our undying affections for one another. On the off-chance my spouse is reading this: Hi Mikey! I love you 365 days and like you most days. xoxo

However, inevitably social pressures get the best of us and we cave, scrambling last-minute to find a box of chocolates and a reservation somewhere before 10PM. Despite my disdain for this Hallmark holiday, here is a list of Valentine’s Day gifts I find acceptable.

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Unicorn Light Up Slippers – Amazon

Fluffy unicorn slippers that light up – essentially every girls dream.

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Drivemocion LED Car Sign – ThinkGeek

Sixteen messages or faces to help express my road rage?! What more could a girl ask for?

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Whiskey and Rum Making Kit – uncommongoods

No explanation needed.

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Emergency Clown Nose – uncommongoods

Because honestly – life is too much sometimes or we just take shit way to seriously. We ALL need Emergency Clown Noses. Everyone. Frankly, I think the world would be a better place

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Pokemon Inspired Earring Gift Set – CloudNineDreams

Stud earrings are a must and these cuties are a necessity. I would ROCK those little Squirtles!

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Taco Magnetic Bookmark – craftedvan

Books are amazing. They take you to an entirely new place. But what good is a book if you can’t remember where you left off? This etsy vendor makes the coolest bookmarks! However, I am partial to the jumbo taco because duh. Books + tacos = HEAVEN.

There you have it – a list acceptable Valentine’s Day gifts that any totally awesome person would graciously accept. AND most of them are completely affordable. There is no need to get into a financial conundrum over a stupid holiday.

So, what do you want for Valentine’s Day?

She saves me.

Two weeks ago I was casually browsing the inter webs and thought I would peak on some of my favorite people on the world. We all have those people we like to follow and see what they are doing. Yours are like Kim Kardashian or Kanye. Mine are a little different. Mine are Chrissy Teigen (because who doesn’t love Chrissy?), a few cooks (because who doesn’t love food?) and Jennifer Lawson (aka the author of TheBloggess). I stumbled across a post where Jenny said she was coming to Ohio!!! The woman I essentially idolize, IN OHIO. I immediately took to Facebook to find out where. And other Jenny fans told me she was going to be at Books by the Banks in Cincinnati. That’s like spitting distance from me…if you can spit 40 miles away. Nonetheless – completely doable. I told Mikey. He was all like you have to go and see her. Well DUH! So we made plans to leave first thing in the morning, get my books signed, maybe see her speak….everything was falling into place.

I went to bed that night planning to see my hero in the morning. I day dreamed of use becoming BFFs. But I woke up early in the morning… completely panic-stricken. I wanted to go and meet this amazing woman who speaks to me in the darkest times in my life, who reminds me to keep going when my brain wants me to do stupid things, who lets me know that it’s okay to hurt, who lets the world know that there are other people out there fighting depression, anxiety and all kinds of fucked up shit….but I was terrified. What if I went and didn’t get to see her? What if we missed her speak or didn’t get my books signed? What if she was like you’re a fucking disaster, GET IT TOGETHER? What if I couldn’t remember my name? So I just laid in bed and didn’t say anything.

At about 10:30AM – Mike woke up and questioned why we were still at home. I made up some bull shit about not wanting to screw up everyone’s plans for the day. He clearly read through my weak ass excuse. These were our plans. He told me I was being stupid and to get my ass up and get ready to go meet Jenny Lawson. So I did.

We got to Books By the Banks just in enough time to listen to Jenny speak. She read from her book – Furiously Happy – and then answered questions. I got to ask the first one and she complimented by Harry Potter shirt! Potter Weasley 2016!! I could have died at that moment. Then we waited in line and she signed my books. We chatted like we were the best of friends. And in my head we totally are. 🙂

Easily goes down as one of the most memorable days of my life.

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Today I am furiously happy I met @thebloggess! And she liked my tee shirt!